This cheese is far from easy when it comes to deciphering the Bible-length list of artificial ingredients. Cheese should never be an aerosol nor a liquid unless it's extremely hot. Therefore, we are hitting it with a healthy dose of food-shame. Shame on you, spray cheese. SHAME ON YOU.
American chocolate tastes like actual dirt. There, we said it. Hershey's is the worst offender with its plasticky aftertaste and grainy texture. Remove and replace with (British) Cadbury's or anything Belgian, please. Thank you.
These red, rubbery, artificial-tasting THINGS are not sausages. If we're having a bbq, we want proper, wholesome sausages that have the texture of meat (because they are actually made of it). Wieners leave a weird aftertaste and we'd rather not consume something that can fester in a bag of water for months.
It is almost entirely made of oil, gum, preservatives and high-fructose corn syrup, an ingredient banned in Europe due to its terrible effects on our health. We know you've been slowly weaned onto it and convinced it's a dairy product since childhood, but as a foreigner trying it for the first time, it's literally just chemicals.
For the love of God, WHY does your bread taste like pure syrup?! It's nearly impossible to buy a loaf or eat a sandwich without it tasting like an overly-processed dessert. We don't eat savory cake, so why would we want sweet bread? Why?!
You're not helping yourselves here, are you? You all laughed during Elf when he put syrup on his spaghetti, but this is the exact same thing. The well-known stereotype of Americans is that they put sugar and fat in everything they eat. Well, in this case, it's a fair statement to make.
"Hello waitress, could I please have some grainy, tasteless slop with my eggs?" said no foreigner, ever. This dish feels like something that was once made out of necessity but accidentally stuck around way too long.
One of the most alarming parts of visiting an American supermarket is the cake counter. You need sunglasses to handle the amount of neon food coloring. We shudder to think what these crazy additives are doing to your kids' insides... We'll leave the mess for you to clean up when they become hyperactive and smear frosting on the walls.
This tastes like cough syrup spiked with 20 teaspoons of sugar. We can only imagine this drink first came about when someone had run out of soda at a party and decided to get experimental with the bathroom medicine cabinet.
We will never understand why everyone is so obsessed with cinnamon. It is literally unavoidable with flavors both sweet and savory alike. The most disturbing instance is when a friend offers you gum and, instead of refreshing mint, you get a mouth-burning dose of cinna-hate. Rawr!