There is a new communications manager for the Romanian Internet strart-up company, Catbox.ro aptly named Boss. This Scottish Fold beat out 700 contenders for the position, making us extremely curious as to how so many people who were actually able to write a resume lost out to a cat. The position will require Boss to appear on camera for the company's videos and stamp each box shipped out to a customer. Oh, he will also be paid a portion of his wages in cat-food. Here is to hoping he treats his new power and position with the dignity and respect it deserves.
2. Man Dances On Patrol Car, Is An Amatuer Vampire Hunter
In a really creepy move, Mike Huckabee went public with his feelings about transgender people during a speech at the 2015 National Religious Broadcasters Convention in Nashville, Tennessee. In his speech, Huckabee stated:
"[These] ordinances [say] if your 7-year-old daughter””if she goes into the restroom””cannot be offended and you can't be offended if she's greeted there by a 42-year-old man who feels more like a woman than he does a man.
Now I wish that someone told me that when I was in high school that I could have felt like a woman when it came time to take showers in PE. I'm pretty sure that I would have found my feminine side and said, "Coach, I think I'd rather shower with the girls today."
Although Huckabee's job we're pretty sure is to just constantly be a Republican presidential candidate, we must admit that equating being transgender to immediately wanting to creep on young women is a level of reaching we're struggling to understand.
4. Boys Will Be Boys and Sexually Assault Chicken Sandwiches
Damn boys will do anything for a laugh, and apparently in Grand Forks, N.D the boys on the junior varsity basketball team will even do a sandwich. According to local news, the boys were on an away game trip when they decided it would be fun to put their....bodily fluids in a McChicken and a bottle of Gatorade, then make other team members consume them. Whenever I read headlines like these, it reminds me that the true American Horror Story is probably just teenage boys.
5. Beatles Memorial For George Harrison Destroyed By Beetles
Want an A? Well at Encinal High School in San Francisco a teacher is being accused of assigning a particularly strange extra credit opportunity. He asked students to go home and find their parent's private toys and condoms and take a selfie with what they found. One student brought in a photo and it was used as an example of what other students should do in class. We're not sure how this was allowed to happen, or what the repercussions will be for the teacher, but it is California so who honestly knows.
7. Woman Sues Ebay For Denying Her Right to Sell Land on Sun
Maria Angeles Duran wants you to know she owns the sun! This Spanish woman claimed ownership of the sun in 2010 and has finally gotten the go-ahead to take eBay to court for attempting to stop her from selling plots of land on the sun to customers. Duran was shocked when eBay shut down her page but was still charging her comission for using the website. We're not sure what is hotter, the sun or this woman's confidence to sell people land they will literally never be able to use.
8. Air Force Destroys ISIS Compound Thanks to Selfie
In a poor attempt to train new interns this morning, the BBC accidentally tweeted, "BREAKING: Queen Elizabeth is being treated at Edward 7th Hospital in London. Statement due shortly," and later added, "Queen Elizabeth has died." BBC reporter Ahmen Khawaja, who was responsible for the mishap, immediately deleted the tweet and apologized. No word yet from the Queen, though a Buckingham Palace spokesperson did tweet that the Queen is certainly alive and well.
10. Man With Machine Gun Claims Harassment in an Airport
Atlanta man Jim Cooley wandered his local airport with a machine gun, making many travelers anxious. What's more, he's complained that he was "harassed" by local law enforcement and other travelers for what he says was simply "practicing [his] second amendment rights." City officials have criticized the fact that citizens are permitted to carry weapons in the open and public areas of the airport, as it is perfectly legal for citizens to walk through the airport with their weapons displayed in view, provided they do not move into the TSA-controlled areas of the airport property.