We're not here to praise Disney's magic. We're here to ruin it. So if you want to stay in your beautiful, magical little Mickey Mouse bubble, stop reading now. This article will make you see the Disney parks in a whole new light, and it's not a flattering one. Because as every real magician knows, it's all just an illusion. And since Disney is the greatest magician of all time, there are a lot of illusions in the parks...and we're going to expose some of their tricks for you. If that sounds like a buzzkill for you, we get it. We all love Disney, and coming to grips with the fact that it's just one giant show can be a bit too much to swallow. So we understand if you leave. But if you want to see some real, honest photos from behind the scenes at Disney parks, then stay with us.
Because we have a lot more photos to show you like this one. The Magic Kingdom? More like the Decapitated Kingdom. You'd better believe that the folks at Disneyland are pissed off that this backstage photo has made its way onto the internet. They're going to find out who took it and when they do... Heads. Will. Roll.
This is what it looks like underneath your Doom Buggy when you're riding on the Haunted Mansion. Sheesh, take away all the smoke and mirrors and suddenly it's not that hot of a party anymore. It's actually creepier to see them like this than when they're supposed to look like ghosts on the actual ride.
On the Matterhorn Bobsleds, if you ever find yourself freaked out by the Abominable Snowman's haunting pair of eyes in the shadows, just take a photo of him with your flash on. Then you'll realize that the only thing you actually have to fear are your fellow passengers now that you've ruined everybody's fun.
The Finding Nemo submarine ride makes it feel like you've descended to the depths of the ocean floor. Photos of the attraction with the water drained, however, reveal the truth: That "ocean" is just as fake and inauthentic as those $5 beignets you've been scarfing in New Orleans Square.
Truthfully, this photo of what the Jungle Cruise hippo actually looks like doesn't faze me. As my skipper so helpfully pointed out, it's not the hippos in the water that you have to worry about...it's the ones in the trees.
You know, they say these guys want to come home with you, but if you actually break through the glass and attempt to pry one of these hitchhiking ghosts off of its pole, the Haunted Mansion staff suddenly take a completely different tone.