All we want to do when it's finally the weekend is get all dressed up and drink our bodyweight in alcohol. We DON'T want to have a quiet dinner and stare deeply into our S.O.'s eyes across a candlelit table.
Wedding season is the actual worst and not just because it's expensive and uses up all our vacation days.
Watching two people commit themselves to a lifetime together is unsettling...Are we a failure for not wanting what they have? Do we secretly want it but pretend not to because we don't think we'd ever achieve it?!
We don't know what we'll be doing by June 2017; we barely know what today is about yet. Forking over a ton of money on something with our S.O. is far too high a risk when we might not even be with them then. Sorry, but can we please just live in the moment?
We wish we didn't feel like this and it's probably the key reason why we are perpetually single but...
We just want to make decisions and not have to worry how they will affect someone else. Maybe we WANT to waste our paycheck on one pair of glorious shoes. Maybe we DON'T want to have to hide them in our car then pretend they're old when you see us wearing them.
Much like our beloved nights out, we also like to keep our vacations S.O. free. Dancing until dawn and recovering by the pool sounds much more fun than arguing over how much to tip the tour guide.
We know because we once spent an entire week in Mexico ignoring our partner and gazing longingly at the "party table." Shots all around? Nope, we had an early night so we could catch the couples weaving class at 8 a.m.
We are never going to want to eat exactly the same foods, so STOP making us do a joint shopping trip! We have spent years perfecting our grocery list so that we can be sufficiently nourished yet still have money left over for fun stuff.
14. You Remember Nothing About Your Partner's Family