Here we have it, folks - pictorial evidence that I was indeed one of the many, many, many, many people to attend Coachella Weekend one, as I'm sure your Snapchats and Instagram stories have informed you.
This is my fourth Coachella, if you count the fact that I attended Coachella 2017 both weekends. Before you start thinking I'm some sort of affluent crazy person who thrives off of roasting in the desert and listening to music you could have paid much less to see somewhere else, hold up. I've got a gig where I get to go and work as a vendor selling popsicles. Essentially, my experience is the same as anyone with a regular ol' general admission ticket. Just for about eight hours in the middle of it I'm slinging pops at people.
Whether you're an Indio Valley regular or never been to a festival in your life, you probably still know that the whole ordeal is no small matter. So knowing what to bring to a three day experience in the desert where if you stayed awake 24 hours a day there'd still be plenty to do would freak out even the most organized planners and packers. Since I'm such a knowledgeable, established veteran, I can help.
This is my lovely friend who worked with me, modeling basically your number one necessity (besides a fanny pack): sunglasses.
It seems like a given, considering the sun is essentially beating down on you from the second you get up in the morning until sunset. So if you left your sunglasses at home, you might as well just not even go to Coachella after all. Or, you could just buy sunglasses. These sunnies that are being modeled are from Sunglass Warehouse.
Here's a secret about Coachella: it's as dusty as a bowl of dust in the Dust Bowl. So these guys are gonna keep your eyes shielded from that. Not only that, they're affordable. What about those Ray Bans you had your eye on, though? To anyone who has ever brought a pair of Ray Bans to Coachella, I was to scream at them: DO NOT. I cannot tell you the amount of destroyed sunglasses I've seen abandoned on the festival floor. Or the amount of times I've heard someone say: crap, I left my sunglasses somewhere and now they're gone. Do yourself a favor and get yourself some glasses from Sunglass Warehouse instead, because you're going to be really sad when that dude in the wolf t-shirt and Birks steps on your ulta expensive shades.
If you're a girl and you've always wanted an excuse to wear psychedelic, out of this world makeup and not get some questioning looks, this is the place for you. But after you put all that work into your look, you don't want it to just melt off your face.
Please excuse my awkward claw hand, but also please go out and get yourself some FACE atelier Face Finish. I didn't get crazy with makeup this year, but I did wear foundation and cover up and some eyeshadow. Then I sprayed this stuff on my face. And by Sunday night after I finally made it home at 3 AM, it was all STILL on my face.
That means that from 8 AM when I woke up and put my foundation on, to working an eleven hour overtime shift, to running a mile in one direction and a mile back to get food, to dancing around while selling popsicles, to fighting through intense dust clouds, getting on a shuttle, and trekking back home, it all stayed in tact. That's actually pretty remarkable. And it smells like cucumbers.
The first time I ever went to Coachella, I assumed I would be roughing it and not showering for a solid three days, since I would be camping in the campground. But nope, they want everyone to be all fresh and clean, so mobile showers are provided. You just have to wake up at seven in the morning or earlier, or wait in a line of about fifty people fighting for the six showers available to you.
The first year I waited in the line of fifty people and had no towel, fresh clothes to change into, or shower shoes. (It was a struggle, yes, but you cannot imagine how good it feels to shower off 17 layers of dirt and sunscreen, so it was worth it.) Now, however, I have wised up. I got myself some shower shoes. But like, actual, legit shower shoes.
I left these shoes outside my tent, and as people walked by, I heard them say how they thought they were cool, and what a good idea they were. And they are. These showaflops drained all the water from my shower right through 'em and didn't do that squishy watery flip-flop thing that other ones do. And they protected my feet from all the nasty stuff you find in a communal shower, especially one at Coachella - hair, dirt, bandaids, clothing, and others, but I'll stop grossing you out.
I sleep in staff camping, but in the morning always sneak over to general camping because they have all kinds of nifty things to do. One of those things is yoga every hour. Because I had to carry all my stuff in from a shuttle a few miles away, I didn't want to bring my big bulky yoga mat into the campground and have no hands to carry it with. So this yoga towel was the perfect solution, because I just folded it all up into my regular bag.
When actually doing yoga, it was nice and soft on the grass. I have done yoga on the grass on my regular matt previously, and it can get all awkward and stiff. Not this one. I was actually so comfy that afterward I took a nap right here on the towel, too. What I didn't realize was that there was another class after the one I attended, so I woke up to a lot of people doing downward facing dog right into from of my face.
Obviously, these are not all the things you need to bring to Coachella, but I could basically write you a novel about that. If anyone actually wants to contract me to write a novel about that, I'm right here. Well, actually, I'll be at Coachella next weekend, but maybe after that. For now, start with this stuff. People will think you're some kind of Coachella expert.