My first name is "Fiery" and my last name is "Doritos Locos Taco Supreme." It's German. Burp.
Alligator. Snapping. Turtles.
Photo: Flickr MyFWCmedia
If McDonald's runs out of nuggets, you're supposed to call the police station first. It's not technically an emergency until the nuggets have been missing for 24 hours. Duh.
That's meth'd up, you guys.
"We were just monkey-ing around."
If that alligator snapping turtle didn't scare the living daylights out of you, how about SHARK-EATING BOBCATS?
I think God's trying to tell you something, buddy. He wants you dead.
HASHTAG: SHORTS. HAHAHAHA
When Santa has too much time on it hands.
Is this what that Tim Allen & Martin Lawrence movie was about?
If you don't have a lightsaber, use a bottle of Newman's Own Salad Dressing. *
I'm for gun control if it means more stories like this.
If that's how they treat the sheriff, the rest of us have no chance.
Authorities say they would have let the man go if he had cooked the eggs and potatoes. Because, duh, breakfast.
He was arrested at a McDonald's while wearing his high school's t-shirt.