And he's bigger than you. So you have to listen.
Your stomach is making noises you thought were reserved for sound effects in horror movies.
All the food in your belly now. Chewing is optional.
Must. Get. To. Food.
But you'd never eat your dog. Unless... No, you'd never eat your dog.
Do all those flavors even go together?
Does it even matter?
Though you do, for a second, debate making a sandwich using a potato as bread and hot sauce as a filling.
Your S.O. is like, "Hey, can you pass me the remote?" and you're all, "WHY SHOULD I WHEN YOU NEVER DO ANYTHING NICE FOR ME, DICK?" Which you would never do if you had even half a Fruit Roll-Up in your stomach right now.
Why do you have to go to it? Life is so unfair.
This is a Code 3 emergency. Code 3 is the most serious, right? Or is it Code Blue? Whatever, doesn't matter, everyone needs to get out of your way.
You're faced with mankind's biggest enemy to action: options.
"Quit wasting time!"
Even if you have to crawl on your hands and knees to get to food...even if you have to eat with your feet...you are eating right now.
And you're not sharing with anybody.
You wanted food, stomach? Now you have all the food. Happy now?
AND OMG EVERYTHING YOU'RE EATING IS THE MOST DELICIOUS THING YOU'VE EVER TASTED IN THE HISTORY OF EVER.
Although it's not fair for your stomach to complain when he's the one that got you into this situation in the first place.
After all that stress, you deserve it.