It's easy to forget how far along we've come technology-wise in just 20 years. That's why right now Guff would like to remind you just how rich you'd have to be back in the mid-'90s to enjoy all the features that come with your basic mobile phone package today.
Take text messaging, for starters. A pager would've run you about $70, which may seem like a lot until you realize that it can store upwards of thirty messages at once!
While we're at it, let's throw on another $70 for the convenience of listening to your music wherever you go. Of course, today's modern cellphones still haven't figured out how to give you that glorious skipping experience that the Sony Discman so thoughtfully doled out, but there's still time for innovation.
Sure, you could find a cheap camera in the '90s for under a hundred bucks, but if you want anything close to the level of precision and customization that comes in the standard Android camera app, you'll easily be dropping half a grand. Think about that next time you take a photo of your brunch.
Of course, $30 is the low end of the spectrum here, because this does not include the extra $10-$15 you should have been spending on novelty answering machine tapes purchased through the back of a magazine.
...Oh, and if you ever plan on actually viewing those aforementioned memories, you're going to need a designated playback device, something humans used to call a "VCR." Isn't it fascinating to learn about ancient cultures?
The '90s were a tough decade. You had to just watch whatever it was that the TV programmers happened to be broadcasting at the time, even if it was The Nanny. Thankfully, we have YouTube now, so people can focus their attention on quality content such as a dancing banana or a baby biting his brother's finger.
Even 20 years ago, these never seemed worth the money to me. After all, wherever you go on this planet, I find that everyone can understand the universal language of shouting at people in English while pointing at things.